Maria Ria Abella Jose

Muchas Gracias

Dear Love, I was apprehensive taking the trip we were supposed to take together. But it was better than I expected. It's great being single again. I finally understand why we can't be together and I thank you for giving me that. When I went on the trip, I thought maybe I'd be thinking about you all the time and how the trip would be better if you were there with me. Truth is, it was almost perfect without you there. The combination of work, old and new friends, booze, partying, and stress gave me a new perspective. It would have probably been a fun trip with you but I would have probably been too guarded, too worried about you that I wouldn't be able to work and party as hard as I did. I finally see what some of my friends told me, that I wasn't me when I was with you. It's both good and bad. Good because I became a better person when I was with you. And bad because somehow I made us the center of my life. You might not believe it, but I was trying very hard to make us work and I suffered…

A Crazy Little Thing Called Love

Day 50

...and I'm still counting. I just finished watching "The Love Affair," and I am now in the middle of "First Love (A Crazy Thing Called Love)." These films are two of my most favorite romance films. I have been watching a lot of those lately because for 50 days, I have been trying to do everything there is to do to try to get over a break up. I have tried staying in for two days. I have tried going out and staying up late. I have tried watching cheesy Tagalog films. I have tried binge-ing and I have tried dieting. I have cried myself to sleep. I have tried drowning myself in work. I have posted emo messages and status updates. I have become addicted to Facebook games which I was so against before. Yes, I have tried almost everything there is to do when one is depressed or heartbroken. Kulang na lang mag-droga ako. Last weekend, we saw each other and it was then that I realized he was right. That we are not for each other. That while there is nothing fundamentally wrong with each one of us, it could have never worked out. I could have…

Ria Jose, Hair and Make Up by Envy Me Salon, Photography by Eight Espino

A Letter to My Ex Boyfriend

Dear Love, It's past 5 am. Hours ago, I vowed to myself that this year will be better. No more heartbreaks and no more pining for you in 2011. And I think I might be able to make it. It's been 1 year and 9 days since we broke up. But you broke my heart many times before that and a couple of more times after that. You and I know I have been holding on because I love you and I know we'd be great together. If somebody were to ask me years ago even before I met you what kind of guy I'd like to be in a relationship with, I'd probably describe somebody like you: smart and intelligent, tall and kinda athletic, a bit geeky and nerdy, driven, somebody I can talk to about anything I want to talk about. Before you, there was only one other guy who fit my idea of who I should be in a relationship. We were in a constant tango, me and him. As we also were. We had those eight months. I have learned a lot about myself, about life, about love, and what I deserve. It was never easy…

My Christmas Messages… for the Guys who Broke My Heart

I wasn't in any relationship this 2010 but I went out with some interesting guys, and kept in touch with some guys I dated in the past years. I'd like to think we're all good friends. And just because it's Christmas soon, here are some of my holiday messages for the guys who broke my heart. :) AJ, Thank you for being a friend! For never getting pikon even if I sometimes tested your patience. I admire you for being a good father to your kids. Don't worry my dear, I'll try to be your lucky charm in the coming years rather than the bad luck charm I have been. All is forgiven. Hope you find that special person who'll finally give you clarity and permanence. JF, WHADDAP?! I guess I should have believed people when they told me you're up to no good. You should really learn how to give closure to the girls you date. Hope you find the one who'll finally make you forget your past. I know there's a part of you holding on. LS, I know you're not happy but you don't have the balls to choose freedom. Call me when you do and I'll…

I Try

I used to really love Macy Gray's I Try, though I couldn't relate to what the song is saying. But now I do and I love the song more than ever. The song captures so perfectly how I have been living my life the past few months. It's about trying to move on and forget a past love. Sing it with me all yeah broken-hearted friends... "I try to say goodbye and I choke, Try to walk away and I stumble." My absolute favorite is the part that goes: I may appear to be free But I'm just a prisoner of your love And I may seem all right and smile when you leave But my smiles are just a front Just a front, hey I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you And I'll try to keep my cool, but I'm feenin' I try to say goodbye and I choke Try to walk away and I stumble Though I try to hide it, it's clear My world crumbles when you are not here Goodbye and I choke I try to walk away and I stumble Though I try to hide it, it's clear My world crumbles when you…

One More Chance

Needless to say, Madam Ria is feeling emo today. And I want to celebrate the emo-ness with some scenes, lines, and analysis of Star Cinema's epic 2007 movie, One More Chance featuring John Lloyd Cruz and Bea Alonzo. Contrary to what industry insiders might think, it was not just the magic of the Bea and John Lloyd tandem that brought in the crowds. It might have been what brought the crowd during the first two weeks of the film's cinema run, but it was the film's story and lines that made the viewers cry, come back to cry some more, quote the movie, and revere it solemnly. video courtesy of hankin16. Rights belong to Star Cinema. No copyright infringement intended. Scene 1 Popoy (John Lloyd) and Basha (Bea) see each other after a while after their break up. Popoy already has a new girlfriend, Tricia (Maja Salvador). Basha: Sana kaya ko lang tiisin ang sakit na nararamdaman ko. Kasi ako naman humiling nito diba? Ako yung may gusto. Sana kaya ko rin sabihin na masaya ako para sayo, para sa inyo. Sana kaya ko. Sana kaya ko. Pero hindi eh. Ang sama-sama kong tao. Kasi ang totoo umaasa pa rin…