Move On Mo Mukha Mo!

Sinasabi mong wala kang pakialam kasi di ka naman direktang apektado ng Martial Law. Eh kung gayon, tongenuh! Bakit ka pa nag-effort magpost tungkol doon? Wag kang papansin. Kung talagang wala kang pakialam, tahimik na lang. Sinasabi mong move on na kami. Eh ikaw nga nangingialam ka sa di namin pag move on, kami pa kaya na nawalan ng magulang? Tongenuh mo! Sinasabi mong magpatawad na kami. Paano magpapatawad ang taong di hiningan ng tawad? Paano magpapatawad kung patuloy na dine-deny ng mga may sala ang kanilang mga krimen? Paano magpapatawad kung maraming nagsasabing hindi totoo at hindi lehitimo ang sakit na nararamdaman namin? Tongenuh mo! Sinasabi mong legal ang nangyari. Eh tongenuh! Paano na yung pag-aresto, pambubugbog, pagkawala, at pagkamatay ng libo-libong Pilipino, ano na?! Legal ba yun?! Tongenuh! Move on kami doon pero kayo di kayo matahimik kasi ayaw namin ipalibing ang isang kriminal?! Move on kami kahit na pinatay ang mahal naminsa buhay pero kayo di kayo makapag move on dahil di malibing ang isang kriminal? PAKYU PO!!! PAYASO AMPOTAH!!! Sinasabi mong marami siyang nagawang tama at mabuti. Eh tongenuh mo! Dahil ba nakagawa ng mabuti peke na lahat ng pagnanakaw, pagkitil sa demokrasya, pagpatay, at panggago…

Photography by Eight Espino, Hair and Make Up by Envy Me Salon

My 29th Year Part Deux

Despite the illness, the challenges of my house arrest, and the extra safety and health precautions I have to take, I am very grateful to be alive. There was a change in me. and people noticed. I gained a ton of weight, around 20 lbs. And then there was less drinking, less night outs, less stress, and less work. While I was sick, I had to skip a lot of events and was given less workload. While resting, I pondered on a lot of things like love and relationships, forgiveness, letting go and moving on, and many other things about life and dealing with its challenges. This was when I accepted that I couldn't control a lot of things in my life and I accepted it, not quite wholeheartedly, but there was acceptance. I realized that there was really nothing else I'd like to do more than to write. And I told myself I was going to be ok as long as I can write and share my crazy thoughts to the world. I was allowed to go to Metro Manila with the Avatar Media Team for WordCamp Philippines 2010. I delivered the opening remarks to the event and was…

Because I Have to Say These

It has been a rough few months and a brutal year. On the other hand, it has been a challenging and fulfilling one career-wise. With my recent life-threatening illness, I felt that life has not yet gotten tired of giving me more shiz to be emo and angry about. Then again, after more than a month of struggling, I am happy and very grateful to be alive. And yes, I have gotten a bit mellow and is more accepting of how things are. I can easily let go of things now. Despite the challenges and hurdles, I was perfectly happy. That is until last weekend. It was off to a good start until certain things were said. And yes, those might have been in jest, but it's never a happy moment when somebody tells you that your dead father, the one you never really knew, was a very good and kind person and they wonder why you're not a good and kind person. HARSH! And to be told over and over again that your struggle to stay afloat and live a happy life alone can be solved by swallowing your pride and apologizing to somebody who has hurt you so…