Dear Love 08.22.2022

Dear Love, It's me again. I just wanted to write today. I have been meaning to do something. I never thought I would seriously consider it. I never did. You know me. I know I will not be good at it or the best at it, I do not even try. But this time... I want to do it. Like think about it everyday kind of want. I do not have a good enough reason other than the thought would not leave my mind. And though it scares me, it excites me and makes me think I should have tried it a long time ago. Will you jump in with me? I need you there. Will you smile and be proud of me? Are you going to tell me I did well even if I end up being mediocre? As I write this, I am listening to songs that remind me of days when I was a little bit more confident. When I thought I was the best and infallible. When I did not have plans but it did not matter because I was smart and good at almost everything. The songs also remind me of the days that inspire…

Dear Love

Dear Love, I have been planning to write this for a few days now. Despite how complicated what we had was, you were the only one who really saw me. You listened to me. Tried to understand me. Remembered things I mentioned. Consoled me when I needed it. I guess what I am trying to say is "thank you!" For the longest time, I kept on asking myself why our memories mean much to me. We did not have much. Not much time nor memories together. Yet what we had... whatever it was, it still means much to me. And it struck me. You truly saw and understood who I am. And I haven't realized that there are so few so who did that for me, made me feel seen and understood. Like my problems mattered. As if what I said had meaning. That my victories, big and small, were things I should be proud of. While I regret so much of what happened between us, I am still grateful because you always listened. You were always there to comfort me. You never insisted on solving my problems for me but you were always ready to help when I asked…

Dear Love

Dear Love, The past few weeks have been great. The past two days have been especially wonderful. I have been laughing and also been very productive. But today, just a few moments ago, I read a piece of fiction that I have already previously read. I loved it when I first read it. It is a happy end to a sad story. So when I saw it again, I re-read the last few parts. But it made me sad. And suddenly, tears were about to fall. And I found it difficult to move, to lift the glass of water, to stand up. I felt weak. I do not know why. To be honest, I do not want to know why it made me sad. I have things to do. But this, I can do to try to lessen the pain. Or numb myself. I write about it. Tell this story to you. There is nothing more than a sad story here. No lesson, no insight. Nothing new. Just me being randomly sad and not feeling ok for no particular reason. I do not want to cry it out or sleep it off because I really want to finish what I…

Dear Love 02/22

Dear Love, It has been a long time. I have been meaning to write for weeks now but I always forgot to do so. Not because I have no reason to share but, well, because I have been too preoccupied. And I have also started journaling. My entries are mostly short and not as profound as I would like them to be. I often write about an hour before I sleep. So I am usually sleepy or tired. I am still undecided about how I should proceed with journaling. Should I just do as I do now and write about whatever my thoughts are at the end of the day? Or should I try to be more creative? I do want to try to do creativity exercises but I am still unsure about that. My days have been long and productive since January 1. But the past week has been hard. Nothing bad happened. Nothing big really. I was just exhausted. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. I did not plan to rest or take a break but I slept late on Monday because of F1 and was happy to see that I had coincidentally scheduled Tuesday as rest day. And I…

How I Start My Day [Morning Routine]

Good day! How has your January been so far? Mine has been interesting. It has been almost a month and I am now confident to share with you my morning routine. For the first time in a long time, I had nowhere to go on New Year's Eve. I was not feeling too well but I wanted to do something. A few hours before midnight, I decided to act as if it was just an ordinary day and do as I would like to do the rest of the year. 2021 started off with a hearty meal which I ate at around 12 midnight. After eating, I proceeded with the routine that I wanted to follow the rest of the year. I followed this routine for a few days and decided to consult a Physical Therapist / Trainer to make sure it is a healthy routine. More importantly, I wanted to know if it would help me in achieving my fitness goals. She suggested some adjustments and I have so far been enjoying my "mornings" better. Note the quotation marks on "mornings" since I do not always wake up in the morning. Simply put, this is how I start my…

2020 Intentions

This year, I am doing something different. Setting intentions is nothing new or ground breaking. But for me, it is. This is the first time I am actually setting my intentions. I know that I will be more likely to actively work on it and follow through if I publish it. So here it is. I am sharing with you my 2020 Intentions. And I hope you will share yours, too. I consider my 2019 just my research and preparation for 2020. And it went pretty good and I learned quite a lot. It is my first time to start a year with clear intentions and I think it will make a big difference. My 2020 Intentions Here is a summary of my 2020 Intentions: Be HEALTHYOffer VALUE.Be SINCERE.ADVOCATE. Read on to know what these intentions mean to me and how I plan to put these to action. Why Set Intentions? First off, I want to share why I am doing things differently this year. Every year, I get consumed with goals. My mentees and basically everyone who has worked with me know how obsessed I am with establishing SMART goals. Last year, I set out to accomplish goals instead…