Many days, weeks, and months ago, I suffered a betrayal that I thought I could never move past beyond. It cost me a lot of things… confidence in myself, trust in others, and “friends.” Every time I’d encounter a milestone or a reminder of that painful moment, I’d lose all my confidence once again, and paranoia and self-pity would set in. I have tried so hard to avoid those moments and to keep to myself, to hide my pain and sorrow only to be witnessed by me alone.
Today is one of those days. I fear that I will break down and wallow in self-pity. Once again, I want to just keep to myself and have my own pity party but I had made a promise. I will be there, I will face the reality of what had happened, of how my best laid plans had failed despite my earnest and sincere efforts.
I don’t know why I made the promise to be there but I did and I will fulfill it, not just for the people who stayed true and loyal to me but for myself. I have to do it for me. If I kept to myself and just nursed my pain and sorrow alone, it would not do me any good.
I finally watched Jiro Dreams of Sushi. I was moved and inspired by the film. I had wanted to write an extensive blog post about it but I am at loss for words. Instead, here’s an insight on leadership which was reinforced by the movie: “Lead by example.”
I have heard it and read it many times and I believe in it but never have I seen it so succinctly displayed as by sushi master Jiro Ono. He is disciplined, dedicated, and committed that even his suppliers don’t care about gaining profit and selling, they just want to be part of his success.
He shows up for work everyday, ready and committed to elevating his craft. No matter how successful he is, he sticks to his routine and never loses the thirst for excellence. He competes not with others but with himself. He shows his apprentices and his sons the kind of discipline and passion that would make them succeed.
Nobody really asked for this topic but I’m a bit intoxicated and I can’t sleep so what the hell, right? After all, love and relationships are the easiest and hardest things to talk about. Easy because we can all relate to it somehow. Or at least, the lack of it. And hard because it all really doesn’t make sense.
So here I am. 31 and single. One of things I often get asked (luckily, not so much by my relatives) is why I’m single. The answer? I don’t know. I’d like to think there’s really nothing wrong with me. So let’s examine my past relationships, instead.
My first boyfriend (who was not my first love, by the way) was one huge mistake. I’d rather not talk about the guy since we’re friends but let’s just say I went into the relationship just because. It was a long distance relationship and I felt like it was really not a big investment. While I did mourn the breaking up part, the relationship and the break up didn’t really take much of my time or emotions. Our usual nights would go like this…
BF: What you doing?
Ria: Playing DotA. DND.
“Every child, woman and man should possess licence to speak or sing in his or her true voice.”
- Joyce Maynard, At Home in the World (Picador USA)
Today is my 10th Anniversary as a blogger. And that quote is the one I shared from my first blog post. Here’s a screen capture:
First entry of Life with Ria on LJ
and here’s the link. And here’s the full resolution copy of the screen capture: LINK.
Then and now, blogging has been a fulfillment of my dream to write… attempts at getting my thoughts, feelings, and ideas out into the world. Not because I think people can learn from me or that I have something profound to share but because I really just want to write, to speak, to share.
On January 9, 2014, I will celebrate the 10th year anniversary of my first surviving blog entry. I started writing online 15 years ago, in 1999 but only got into the blogging platform in 2004.
So here’s my challenge to myself: blog everyday starting on January 9, 2014.
Here are the rules:
- Each blog post must be published here at Life with Ria.
- Each blog post must be 100 words or more. IF it is a photo or video blog post or a podcast, 20 words should suffice.
- Blog posts must not be about sponsors, clients, blogging events, and the like. Unless the post’s approach, insights, or perspective is personal in nature.
- I must share each blog post on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram.
- IF I skip one day, I will not make up for it some other day. I will just pick up where I left off and just extend the period until I have published at least one post for 365 days.
It has been one year since Typhoon Pablo (Bopha) hit the provinces of Compostela Valley, Davao Oriental, and Davao del Norte but its effects are still greatly felt by survivors. Classified as a Category 5 Typhoon, Typhoon Pablo struck on December 4, 2013. It affected over 6 million Filipinos and over 2,000 were left dead or are still missing.
Kinablangan, Baganga, Davao Oriental
Image by Anj Nacorda of AnjNacorda.com.
Save the Children is an organization focused on giving children “what every child deserves – a healthy start, the opportunity to learn and protection from harm.” They have been on site for many months now and they assert that there has to be an increase in support to help families fully recover the impact of Typhoon Pablo on their livelihood.